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it was a warmish and beautiful sunny day today in my fair city. warm enough to not wear a hat on my not so bald head (sprouts are coming in each and every day!) and be able to walk a block or two and not freeze. feels hopeful…

had dinner with a dear friend of mine last night, who has been touring his one man magical yoga, healer, shaman, rainbow warrior unicorn self around the pacific northwest for the last two months. inspiring to hear how empowering that was for him. I see more such traveling opportunities for myself as well. taking my bag of tricks with me and being able to visit friends and create work as I go.

took a yoga class this morning, received a massage, took myself to lunch and then gave a massage. saw many people today who are dear to me and i am very dear to them. surrounded with love. I love my life. supposed to go to an ecstatic dance tonight,  but just want to crawl into the bath tub and be still instead, and so I shall.

when I think of valentine’s day, I think of colors and textures and scents. there is a chocolate shop here in town that specializes in lavendar/almond white chocolate. divine.  I have received their chocolate for many years for special occasions. I think of soft petal pink, brilliant white and vivid cornflower blue hydrangeas. roses in crimson reds, tangerine, ballet pinks and creamy white. and tulips, my favorite flowers of all, in a myriad of colors.  I bought myself a bouquet of tulips that are a Chinese orange that makes me smile and think of fire every time I look at them.

have had a lovely day. me taking care of me, and that is satisfying indeed.

so I am fixing myself a small simple meal. have a tiny one glass split of champagne in the fridge, I will run a bath, and sip and soak by candle light. 

I find the real core of this day so sweet, and full of open hearted offerings of warmth, and taste and color, and home made cards and kisses and love to melt the slushy wintry landscape and to let us turn our faces to the sun and think of the fresh start that is spring.

I enjoy my time alone and my own company. I am not lonely even as I am alone. I find peace in that. but no matter how content I am, how many friends and how much peace I feel, I cannot kiss myself, and going without kissing is a very sad thing. a real kiss. a kiss that actually means something. no other kind will do i am afraid.  but the spring is coming…and I am hopeful.