full moon: i am full of light


just got home from spending three nightmarish days in the hospital yesterday afternoon. you get to hear that story for halloween…

but for now, it is a day later, and i am strong again, in my body, head clear and heart full and drinking in an amazing fall day. 

it started cold, foggy, damp. the fall colors accentuated beyond belief because of this blanketed sky. it burned off as the day went on. warm, blue skied, that certain pre-halloween excitement in the air.

i went for a walk with my friend to the foothills where you can get up just high enough to see the entire boise valley. a riot of color as far as the eye can see in our city of trees. breathing in the fresh air, enjoying a nice walk, hardly able to believe i was in a hospital hooked up to an iv, waiting for my white cell count to increase before i could go home, only 36 hours before. utterly annihilated. the human body is an amazing thing in it’s ability to bounce back.

tonight the full moon. i always celebrate and acknowledge the cycles of the moon, but her fullness my favorite. i take my crystals outside to juice up in the moonlight.

i had been thinking perhaps i might not lose my hair. some people do not. i started to notice a bit more in my comb yesterday, and today it was filling a brush. shedding my leaves. 

i stand in my barren garden, a place that was tended and planted with so much love this summer , with my dear friend jeffry and with shane. blankets in the grass, moon gatherings, coloring and singing on sundays, body work, reiki circles. sleeping cats, crawling babies. good food, laughter and so much love and friendship.

i stand in the empty garden and finger comb my hair. long beautiful strands of hair. more and more with each pass of my hand and i leave it in the raised beds for the birds and squirrels to build winter nests with. i release this part of myself back into the earth, set it free on the wind. i am ready to let go. to transform and i am full of light.

i love my life.